KaNoEdMo – Albatross

In case you forgot (you probably have), I didn’t do NaNo this year. Instead, I did KaNoEdMo–Kat’s Novel Editing Month. I took the easy way out because I was crazy, crazy busy.

But somehow I managed to finish a fairly big edit of my new MS, Albatross. Huzzah!

Wordcount: 84,440 (compared to the 79,998 first draft 0.0 Whoops.)
Genre: YA Scifi
Spur-of-the-Moment Logline: Albatross, a special forces assassin, must go deep undercover in an alien breeding facility to kidnap an important dignitary. When she starts falling for him, she discovers that everything she thought she knew about the war–and herself–is wrong. (Have I mentioned lately that I’m terrible at writing loglines?)
Random: Why yes, I do quote from the “Rime of the Ancient Mariner”.

Here. Let me tickle your curiosity-bone:

First sentence: The mark’s brown hair is yanked into a bun so tight that the scope reveals skin lifting from strain at the nape of her neck.

Last sentence: “Don’t make me punch you.”

Neither of those changed in the edit!

Favorite sentence: His nails pull out of my flesh with a moist shink, and we stagger apart.

Haha, bet you can’t guess what happened right before that line.

Extra Awkward Out of Context: We grapple for control, her brain slimey under my grip, greasy and hot like cheap French fries.

Though really, even in context it’s pretty crazy.

And finally, the Wordle:

Huh. I said "back" and "like" more than the love interest's name. Well. MORE EDITS.

So minions! Any favorite quotes from your MSs, if you’re writers? Best quote out of context? And seriously, how do I delete all those “back”s? 0_0 I knew it was an issue, but holy guacamole…